*Sigh*

Today is Sunday and find myself in the midst of it being a *sigh* day. A frustrating place to be on what should be an uplifting day following worship service. Today we celebrated the end of the summer in "big service" with all the kids. We had spent the previous 12 weeks coming together--children and leaders alike--learning what it means to be a Christ follower, studying Paul's life in the New Testament book of Acts. Today was the celebration of what we had done as a group all summer long, praising God on stage together.

Personally, I was assigned to half of the 4th grade girls. They were incredibly knowledgeable and open and engaging. A great place to be plopped down in the middle of for the summer. The "other half" of girls was lead by Mary Ann, an incredibly grounded, well-rounded and sweet 80 year old woman of God. We often combined groups due to one reason or another-ranging from not having enough adult volunteers to small group size or, in my case, not feeling fully prepared after battling an on going illness all summer long. I learned a lot having to prepare each week. I certainly am not a Bible scholar and was learning along side the girls. Heidi and Jessica were the special-needs children in the group and being with them was pure joy. Their innocence and openness was refreshing and humbling. Whitney reminded me of my niece Jackie and she shared with such sweetness and honesty. One little girl shared that her sister had died a year earlier from a car crash; another one lost her grandpa after a lengthy illness with pancreatic cancer; some were dealing with bullies or the consequence of their parent's divorce. Humbling, very humbling. Yet they trusted me to listen to them, to care and to offer up an encouraging word. What they didn't know is how incredibly blessed by them I was. Yes, I told them in words that I loved them and how much I enjoyed them, but in their young minds I am not sure they understand how delighted I was to be a part of their lives.

Every Sunday I battle sadness. I have my entire life. I used to dread Sundays. So did my mom. As sure as the sun comes up, there is going to be a battle and strife in my house--with the kids or between me and Tony. Always. Perhaps I create what I fear? I am not sure. Perhaps God is trying to teach me something. OK, I'm listening...start talking. All I know is that my heart is heavy and my thoughts are not in line with who I am in Christ.  Matthew 11:28-30 says "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest.. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light". I claim this scripture today. I claim it for this Sunday and for all the Sundays to follow.